Monday, April 4, 2016

Hard Spiritual Truth

The spiritual things we need to learn are not all fluffy, sweet, and soft.  Several years ago my brother was diagnosed with a rare form of lymphoma, he'd had it two years before he went to the doctor.  Thankfully it was a slow growing cancer, but it had spread to several parts of his body.  When he first told me, I fell apart.  We are close, of all of us kids, me and my three brother's, we are the closest.  We have a strong bond.  I called a friend of mine and crying told her about my brother.  I expected comfort but that is far from what I got.  I got a figurative smack in the back of the head.  She very sternly said "stop it!"  She then went on to ask me if I was a believer, and I said you know that I am and her reply was "start acting like it!"  I was taken aback by her words.  Offended really.  Until she explained further- She told me if I was a believer then I should act like I believe.  She said that God does not give us a spirit of fear and that I should remember what I had learned in Bible study and apply it.  She was so right!!!  She does give me comfort but she will smack me when I need it.  It has made all the difference when I started applying what I had been taught.  I stopped living in fear.  I prayed fervently for my brother and I begged others to do so as well.  And you know what, he is in remission and has been for over 10 years now.  These thoughts and prayers are what have carried me through some of the toughest times since then.  It's not a simple lesson to learn but once you learn it, life changes.  Another friend of mine posted on her blog "God will give you more than you can handle" and I have found that to be true as well.  The saying that "God will never give you more than you can handle" is not in the Bible and is nonsense.  It is only in our weakness that God can show what He can do.  When I was faced with the impending death of my husband, even though I couldn't form the words to pray I got up every morning and said "Thank You Lord".  He was there with me lending me His strength and giving me comfort for the toughest of times.  Now my boss' wife has been diagnosed with breast cancer.  He has fallen apart.  I so long to tell him the truth I learned but he is not receptive so I hold my tongue.  I pray that you learn these truths.  Even though we go through horrible times He is there to help and comfort us.

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Spring has Sprung!!!

My dogwoods are blooming!  It never ceases to amaze me, no matter when Easter falls, my dogwoods bloom that week.  Doesn't matter if it is in March or April.  I so enjoy seeing the Lord's hand moving in the simplest of things; it inspires awe in me every time I witness it.  The Lord's attention to detail is always amazing to me.

I found a lovely vintage pattern for the lace border for my shawl.  It is coming along nicely.  I have about 22 more repeats to go through before I will be done.  It is easier than what is on the Coast and I find it much easier to knit it separately.  I will pick up the edge stitches and then do a three needle bind off with the live stitches from the shawl.  Here's the pattern for the Bartle Lace that I am using on for my shawl.  I think it will be a good combination.  My sweater is still in time out.  I think I'm going to frog and leave it for now and start another sweater.  I'm not having a good time with it so might as well put it aside.

On the wedding front, I have booked the chapel.  I meant to purchase a notebook last week to keep my notes in and I didn't do that so, I am going to run to the store to get a salad for lunch and will pick one up then.  I really need to start keeping track of what needs done and what I have done.  The flowers I want for my bouquet are on sale at Hobby Lobby for 50% off this week so I'll be headed there on Wed. to purchase what I need.  I purchased some lovely crystal and flower picks to go in my hair last week because they were on sale for 50% off and I got some wide ribbon to wrap around the handle of my bouquet for 50 % off too.  Just gotta love sales!!! I have found someone to get a small cake for Tim and I on our wedding day and have found a place to get my hair, makeup and nails done.  Just have to book them.  The bakery is the cutest little place and the people are so nice, I really like doing business with small business owners.

I need to take dd with me to find her prom dress.  I am hoping we can find one.  We have shopped in so many places and no one has one that will fit her.  My daughter is not fat she's built like an amazon and they just don't make prom dresses to fit her.  We used to get dresses at Deb's because they did and they have gone out of business.  Don't know what we will do.  She is almost 14 is almost 6 feet tall and isn't as thin as a rail; she is a softball player so her shoulders are broad.  I don't want to order off line because you never know what you will get.  If anyone has any suggestions please chime in.

Next thing on the calendar is dd's graduation and prom.  Those are coming up in May.  I need to plan a party and need to schedule her for an appointment to have her hair, makeup and nails done.  Our usual hair dresser is unable to do it for her because her son is graduating from high school the day of the prom.

I have to keep reminding myself, one day, one thing at a time or I get overwhelmed with everything that needs done.

I hope you enjoy the glorious day the Lord has given us!

Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Life

Does time ever slow down?

Really!  Seems the older I get the faster it goes.  I am making strides into the flowers for my brother's wedding.  I have made the brides bouquet and her throw away bouquet, and bouquets for 3 of the 4 bridesmaids.  And 13 corsages to make.  I have to go get some more flowers tonight after work because I ran out of daisies.  I am thoroughly enjoying putting them together.  Since my knitting mojo has deserted me at the moment, I am happy to focus on something else.  On Sunday, just because I needed to relax, I colored in some coloring books my daughter bought me for Christmas.  I loved it!

My knitting woes.....I didn't like the lace for my Coast shawl, so I am trying to change it.  Tried a twisted 2x2 rib last night and didn't like it so I am going to be ripping it out tonight.  I am going to look for a new edging today when I am not busy.  My sweater is being neglected because I cannot make it work the way it should.  So, I've temporarily put it in time out.  I am either going to get it out this weekend or I am going to start something else.  It's not the pattern's fault it is me but, I have gone down two needle sizes and it's still not working properly.  Oh well, I have lots of lovely yarn waiting to be knit and lots of lovely projects I want to knit.

My counter tells me that my wedding day is 171 days away and my honeymoon is 174 days away.  I have got a lot to do between now and then!!!  I am starting to make lists of things that need to be done.  My brain has been so scattered with my brother's wedding, dd's grade school graduation, prom, our wedding and our trip that I cannot keep things straight.  Gonna go buy a notebook today to start keeping track.  I keep telling myself one thing at a time.  Start with brother's wedding and move on but then I think about all that has to be done and bought and scheduled that I get a little crazy!  LOL

Well, I've blathered enough for now.  Have a wonderful day!

Monday, March 21, 2016

Spring!

I love this time of year.  Not as much as I love the fall of the year, but I love it.  My daffodils have bloomed, my dogwoods and crab apple are starting to bloom and the ornamental Japanese cherry tree is not far behind.  The temps are warmer and I want to plant everything and work in the yard.  Feels like I won't get the chance as busy as my life is right now but I am going to attempt to.

On the knitting front-I am working on the lace border for my Coast Shawl.  Took me a while to wrap my head around it because it is a knit on edging.  Never done one of those before.  My sweater is on hold, I am unhappy with it.  I have gone down 3 needle sizes and it's still not coming out right.  I refuse to knit a sweater on size 2 needles.  I am looking forward to getting my shawl off the needles so I can start on the vest I want to make.  The sweater may be put in the time out bag and I might start a different one in the mean time.  I have some other shawls planned as well.  I have a Boo Knits one that I bought beads for that I want to make and I would love a poncho to wear in England/Scotland instead of a jacket.  Need to buy yarn for it or find something in my stash to knit it with.

Life is moving along quickly.  I am counting the days to so many things right now.  My daughters' birthdays are coming up, my wedding and then my trip.  I have found the chapel and the cabin, we just have to book it and the trip is well in hand.  Still so much to do and the ole brain is whirling like crazy but I'll get there.  I'm taking one task at a time.  The next one in line is the flowers for my brother's wedding.  I am going to pick the florist tape up tonight and get started making the bouquets tonight in between doing laundry and dishes and making dinner. 

Well, must run, my day is almost over and then I am off and running to get what I want to do tonight.

Hope everyone has a good night.

Wednesday, March 9, 2016

Weariness and Hamster Wheel Mind

Weariness has set in upon me in the last two days.  I am really exhausted.  I only slept 2-3 hours Monday morning before I had to get up and go to work.  My body is screaming at me to rest and of course being exhausted and stressed does not help my Meniere's disease.  I've been dizzy for the last few days.  My muscles are tight and aching and in need of a massage.  I know all of this and I know how to prevent this but I cannot.  Sometimes my mind and body refuse to shut down for sleep and to relax.  I soaked in the tub for over an hour last night trying to get my muscles to loosen, didn't help much.

I know I have said this before and I will say it again, I long for a simpler life.  I have worked since I was 16 constantly, even when I tech. didn't have a job, I stayed home and took care of my family and worked cleaning houses part time.  I seriously need a long stretch of being at home to get things done and things put in order.  By the time I get home at night I'm exhausted, so much so, I don't cook anymore.  I love to cook, I always have.  I can see a change in me and I don't like it.  I can put a label on it, I AM TIRED OF WORKING FOR SOMEONE ELSE.  If money were not a necessity to live these days, I would live on a farm, grown my own food and animals for food and never leave.  To be self sustaining is something I want so badly.  The only way to get stuff done is to push my body even harder, push through the exhaustion and keep going.  I don't see an end to the wheel I'm on and it discourages me sometimes.

My mind is spinning lately.  There is so much going on that it is hard for me to keep up.  I seriously need a planner just to keep up with everything.  So, here's what's going on in no really order:

1. I have a lot of knitting projects that I want done by the time I leave for my trip, unfortunately, sitting and knitting means nothing else gets done at my house.  If I am not up and doing then my daughter won't do and nothing is accomplished.  I really want to get two more sweaters done and a vest and at least one more shawl besides the one I am working on.

2.  Dd is graduating from 8th Grade and prom is coming up and she has tons of plans for what she wants to do as far as a dress and a party etc.  She is also going to MS to see her sister during spring break, to Myrtle Beach after school is out and we have softball that is about to start.  She keeps me forever going.

3. I have to get everything I need for my trip together.  I need some new clothes, I need to save spending money, need to borrow luggage, plan what knitting projects I am taking with me, etc.  I want to take a present for a friend that I am going to hang out with while I am there so I have to make sure that I find something he would like.

4.  I am getting Married!  Yes that probably should have been listed first but, there it is.  Just before I go on my trip my SO and I are tying the knot.  We are using the trip as our honeymoon.  I have my dress and someone to take pictures but that is it..  I still have to get flowers, reserve the chapel, book the cabin we are staying in, find a place to get my hair done, and a million other little things that need done.  I still haven't told some of my family members because I am afraid of their reaction.  Some of my friends and family are not really supportive of the wedding.  We are having a very small wedding just us and our children but there is a lot to do.  I have to find youngest dd a dress too.  I have to buy little things I need for the wedding and honeymoon as well.

5. In April my youngest brother is getting married and I have to do the flowers for it.  I have them, just haven't started on them yet.  Really need to get those done. 

See so much to do!  Is it any wonder I don't sleep?!?

Well, I've whined enough, going to go back to work and try to accomplish something today.  I was going to sleep at lunch but I'm going to knit and eat instead because I need to work on my sweater!

LOL

Have a blessed day!